RHS Penis Inspection?

This Wednesday RHS staff will be administering “penis inspections” to all male students. Students will be asked to come to school cleanly groomed and ready to be inspected for weaselmites, as those have become an epidemic around our school and town. Students will be separated into two lines, circumcised and uncircumcised, to be treated in the best way possible. If a students penis is seen to be infested with weaselmites, they will immediately be wrapped and taped as to treat the mites and not spread the vermin any further around the school. Principal Tony Newman is advocating for this new type of inspection, “Just to be as thorough as possible.” Students will be issued a pass/fail grade, if a student fails, they will be excluded from all school events. “These are the necessary precautions that we must be taking” – Mike Ernst